I鈥檓 on horrific Spirit Airlines, heading for St. Maarten. Why horrific? This is the airline that feigns it has low prices, but then adds tons of trickster charges. You鈥檙e allowed one (1) carry-on. I don鈥檛 mean one (1) carry-on in addition to your backpack. I mean literally just your backpack! You have to pay for the 鈥渟pace above your seat.鈥� Do you want a little water on your flight? Great! $3. And the trays in front of your seat are juuuust small enough that they don鈥檛 fit a regular laptop.
I鈥檓 using my laptop in the most literal use of its name as possible: on top of my lap. Anyhoo, it鈥檚 all good because I鈥檓 about to go on the latest 半岛体育 Cruise,
I had a show on Friday at the Parker Playhouse in Fort Lauderdale with the adorable Matt Morrison, so I鈥檓 joining the cruise a day later. And thus my problems at the airport began. You see, when you travel internationally, you now have to prove you鈥檙e coming back. So, I got to the airport, told them I was flying to St. Maarten, and they asked me to show how and when I was coming back.
James had warned me, so I had a printout ready with the details of my return flight. Well, turns out, the cruise started in San Juan, Puerto Rico, then goes to various islands, and ends back in San Juan. So my return ticket to New York was from San Juan, even though I initially flew into St. Maarten. They asked me how I was getting to San Juan from St. Maarten at the end of my trip. I told them I was on the 半岛体育 Cruise, which would take me back to San Juan. Silence. Thus followed the kind of thing where every answer you give sounds like you鈥檙e lying:
GATE AGENT: Can we see your cruise ticket?
ME: Um鈥 don鈥檛 have one. They鈥檙e picking me up from the airport.
(鈥淭hey鈥檙e?鈥� Even I didn鈥檛 buy it.)
Then I showed my luggage tag. It had my name and cabin number. (That should do it!)
GATE AGENT: Why does this say you鈥檙e getting on the cruise in San Juan? You鈥檙e flying to St. Maarten.
ME: Oh. Well, I was supposed to. But I鈥檓 starting a day late.
(Silence.)
Everything I said sounded like I was a sweating witness being interrogated by Claire Danes and Mandy Patinkin on Homeland. I tried to think of how I could show proof I was doing the cruise, so I started babbling about how I鈥檓 an entertainer, then I showed her the website with my photo. Silence. She was decidedly not impressed with my headshot. Finally, I had to call the cruise and ask for an official looking email saying that I was indeed getting on the cruise in St. Maarten, sailing to many different islands, and ending in San Juan. It worked, and I was sent on my way with a hefty dose of PTSD.
Before I left NYC, I had Ed Dixon, writer and star of Georgie, on Seth Speaks. The show is about his close relationship with Tony Award winner George Rose鈥攈ow it began so positive and ended so horrifyingly. Ed does such a brilliant recreation of George Rose that it seems as if he鈥檚 onstage with him throughout the show. Not since Christine Ebersole as Little Edie have I seen someone so clearly come to life.
Ed said that Patti Cohenour came to see the show last week. She had starred as Rosa Bud opposite George Rose in Drood, and Ed didn鈥檛 know how she鈥檇 react. After the show, Patti ran up to him, and even though they had never met, she hugged him and buried her face in his chest saying, 鈥淚 miss him so much.鈥� Isn鈥檛 that sweet? There are lots of great showbiz stories, bizarre details about George (he lived with two actual mountain lions), and then some tragic details about him that take the show from a romp into an exploration of, 鈥淲hat would you have done?鈥� See it for yourself!
I also recently had Todrick Hall on Seth Speaks. He鈥檚 finishing his run in Kinky Boots on Broadway, and then starting a concert tour. He talked about growing up in Texas and, instead of going to college, getting a job at Disney World as a performer. He then got a job on a cruise line, which he didn鈥檛 enjoy. (It definitely wasn鈥檛 the 半岛体育 Cruise!) While he was there, he read that Fantasia was joining The Color Purple on Broadway. He was a big fan of hers, and he also happened to see they were replacing a role in the cast that he felt he could do.
Perfect! He quit the cruise (Quit! Just for an audition!), and traveled to New York City. He auditioned all day long and that night went to see Legally Blonde. He was hoping to hear whether he got the show or not, but was upset to see his phone battery had died. He found an outlet in the back of the theatre and plugged in his phone. During Act 1 he had a feeling that he should check his phone, so he snuck to the back of the house, and there was indeed a message from the casting person! He fled Legally Blonde (before Elle got to the long-held note in 鈥淪o Much Better鈥� for you LB fans), ran to the street, and found out he got the show!
Talk about going with your instinct! Same thing with American Idol. He saw how much that show helped Fantasia, so he decided to audition. He went back to Texas, and told the producers he had written his own song for the judges. The producers encouraged him not to sing his own song, but he just knew he should do it. Of course, he was totally right and, after he sang, he was asked to come to Hollywood!
Right after 半岛体育鈥檚 Broadway on the High Seas 8 cruise ends February 24, we do the second Concert For America! February 25 at Town Hall.
Besides Ingrid Michaelson, Will Chase, Keala Settle, Rema Webb, Ramin Karimloo, Juwan Crawley, Nora Schell, and Emily Skinner, we just booked Orfeh, and Martha Wash! Martha is one half of The Weather Girls, and the lead singer on 鈥淓verybody Dance Now.鈥� She has one of my absolute favorite voices, and I鈥檓 so excited she said yes to doing the concert. Of course, her signature song is 鈥淚t鈥檚 Raining Men,鈥� so you know I asked her to do it.
GET TIX (ONLY $32-$57) HERE: .
Speaking to Broadway and charity, our foundation has great things up for auction on Charitybuzz! You can bid on four VIP tix to Concert for America and meet the cast backstage; or see one of Jessie Mueller's final performances in Waitress and meet her backstage afterwards!
And now, greetings from our second cruise stop: St. Kitts! So many people I鈥檓 friends with are here, including my co-writer and director of Disaster!, Jack Plotnick!
I鈥檓 on board the Silver Wind, sailing around various islands, and so far it鈥檚 been wonderful. Today, James, Elizabeth (his mom), Jack, Andrea Martin, and I went to a rain forest, which was beautiful. On the way there, we asked if we could go hike up to a fort we had read about. The driver said there was indeed a hike, but we couldn鈥檛 do it because we weren鈥檛 鈥減hysically fit鈥� enough. Well, we were all highly insulted, but none more so than Andrea Martin. We started defending ourselves to him about how in shape we were but then, weirdly, it became a fight between me and Andrea about who is more fit.
ME: Well, Andrea, you know I work out six days a week.
ANDREA: Really? I work out seven days a week!
Regardless, the driver didn鈥檛 buy Andrea as fit until James literally got out his phone, went onto YouTube and showed Andrea鈥檚 amazing number from Pippin, where she hung upside down from a trapeze. The driver watched it, looked at Andrea and said, 鈥淵ou win!鈥�
Here's the video:
And here's Andrea Martin swinging through the rain forest moments later!
And on that note, peace out!
