Tina Fey of a Mean Girls stage adaptation back in 2013, and it was in fall 2017 in Washington, D.C. Fey continues to about the musical, but just in case she is still looking for ideas, we鈥檝e chosen 15 moments of the movie that would make really 鈥済rool鈥� musical numbers. Happy October 3!
Introduction of North Shore Lunch Table Cliques
In the style of: 鈥淲ilkommen鈥� 鈥� Cabaret
鈥淲ilkommen! Bienvenue! Welcome! Im North Shore! Au North Shore! To North Shore!鈥� says Damian and Janis in matching purple tuxes as they walk the newbie (Cady) to the cafeteria.
The Rules of the Plastics
In the style of: 鈥淐andy Store鈥� 鈥� Heathers, The Musical
Having lunch with the Plastics is like leaving the actual world and entering Heather Chandler鈥檚 candy store.
Meeting Mrs. George
In the style of: 鈥淲hen You鈥檙e Good to Mama鈥� 鈥� Chicago
Ask any of the chickies in her pen, they鈥檒l tell you she鈥檚 not a regular mom; she鈥檚 a cool mom.
The Burn Book
In the style of: 鈥淣o Me Diga鈥� 鈥� In the Heights
You didn鈥檛 hear it from me, but Amber D鈥橝lessio made out with a hot dog.
That鈥檚 So Fetch
In the style of: 鈥淚n My Own Little Corner鈥� 鈥� Cinderella
In Gretchen鈥檚 own little corner, in her own little chair, she can say 鈥渇etch鈥� as many times as she wants and sing about how Regina took away her ability to wear white gold hoops in 4/4 time.
Ms. Norbury at P.J. Calamities
In the style of: 鈥淥ut Tonight鈥� 鈥� Rent
Look me in the eye, and tell me that lady鈥檚 body doesn鈥檛 want to put on a tight skirt and flirt with a stranger after working three jobs all week.
Three-Way Calling Attack
In the style of: 鈥淭elephone Hour鈥� 鈥� Bye Bye Birdie
Teenagers gossiping on the phone will always be timeless.
Principal Duval
In the style of: 鈥淟ittle Girls鈥� 鈥� Annie
The girls have gone wild, sheets of paper fly through the air, and a spot appears on Principal Duval as he sings, 鈥淗igh-school girls, high-school girls, everywhere I turn I can see them.鈥�
Recalling Regina and Janis鈥� Friendship
In the style of: 鈥淢emory鈥� 鈥� Cats
Janis has to have a moment all alone in the moonlight to dream of the old days before that 鈥淜yle鈥� showed up in Regina鈥檚 life.
Cady/Regina/Aaron Love Triangle
In the style of: 鈥淎 Step Too Far鈥� 鈥� Aida
Cady is certain that she loves Aaron and that his hair looks sexy pushed back.
Spring Fling Nominations
In the style of: 鈥淚 Hope I Get It鈥� 鈥� A Chorus Line
They really need that crown, oh God, they need that crown, they've got to get that crown...!
The Confessions
In the style of: 鈥淐ell Block Tango鈥� 鈥� Chicago
And then Gretchen got diarrhea at Barnes & Noble. Gretchen got diarrhea at Barnes & Noble ten times.
Sucking Out the Poison
In the style of: 鈥淗e Lives in You鈥� 鈥� The Lion King
A nod to Cady鈥檚 African ties, why wouldn鈥檛 the spirit of life be calling as Cady sucks the poison out of her life?
Mathlete Competition
In the style of: 鈥淐abinet Battle #2鈥� 鈥� Hamilton
Kevin Gnapoor after Cady wins: 鈥淎nd if you don鈥檛 know, now you know, Mr. President.鈥�
Spring Fling/Epilogue
In the style of: 鈥淵ou Can鈥檛 Stop the Beat鈥� - Hairspray and 鈥淲e Go Together鈥� - Grease
A cheesy, over-the-top finale highlighting the (literal) harmony between the new group of friends is the only acceptable way to end this fetch musical.
